I have spent the majority of my life feeling inarticulate and not particularly good enough at anything. It was only through blogging that I finally started to feel like maybe I was *good* at something. But if I am, it has only been through making a conscious, dedicated effort to get “good” at things every single day - like taking photos, conceptualizing shoots, writing, editing, etc. And it didn’t just fall into my lap. It has been a culmination of everything I had loved, felt, and was touched by for years. These feelings were always teeming in me - I had to release them. To do these things justice I had to get better at whatever medium I could express them in.
This October, I find myself sitting on a chair and looking into a small crowd of college students. My voice is shaky and cracking a lot, but I’m addressing their questions and making eye contact. I’ve been asked to speak on my experience with fashion marketing for Lena Cavusoglu’s Marketing Management class at Portland State University.
I was scared to death, I made many mistakes. But I knew I had to do this. And afterward, even though I replayed my mistakes in my mind and cringed, students still shook my hand and thanked me for my time, and Lena said she’d love to have me back. With adrenaline coursing through my veins, I smiled back at her and said I would love to. After all, I know how to do better next time. Don’t give up on yourself or your dreams ♡
Photos taken at Burgerville after the talk - I needed french fries after that haha!
Congrats on facing your fear! I feel like it would be pretty terrifying getting up in front of all those people and talking, especially if it's not something you're used to doing, and I know I would have been nervous if it were me. Also so nice to see you blogging again - I've missed your posts lovely!
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